Rock on, Ashlee!

I knew there was a reason I really liked Ashlee Simpson. I love they she spoke out in defence of her sister. We need more people like this around!

Ashlee Defends Jessica's Pants, Waist
Says Headlines About Sister's Weight Are 'Embarrassing and Belittling'

(Jan. 28) -- In a blog post titled "Since when did a woman's weight become newsworthy," Ashlee Simpson is lashing out against the recent media coverage of her sister Jessica's physique and wardrobe.

Ashlee says she is "completely disgusted by the headlines concerning my sister's weight," saying it is "embarrassing and belittling to all women to read about a woman's weight or figure as a headline on Fox News." She argues that just a week after the inauguration, such coverage only diminish the " feeling of hope in the air for our country."

Going on, Ashlee says that "all women come in different shapes, sizes, and forms and just because you're a celebrity, there shouldn't be a different standard." Speaking directly to the media, she asks: "Is this something you would say to your wife, daughter, mother, grandmother, or even a friend? I seriously doubt it."

Ashlee ends her arguments with concern for the kids, saying that teenage girls are going to have respect issues "in an environment where we criticize a size 2 figure."

-Des

January update

It sure has been awhile since my last post!

Between all the pain of my tooth/gum infection (that I thought was due to wisdom teeth) and holiday madness it has been a crazy couple of months.

Tooth update: It is not the wisdom tooth. It is tooth # 18 (back molar). It took 2 months and 2 dentists to realize this. Sigh. I have to either a.) get a root canal or b.) get the tooth out. I am going for "b" BECAUSE it is waaaaaaaaaay in the back and no one will ever know and when/if my wisdom tooth comes out - there will be room. I am not looking forward to have it removed on Jan 29th - BUT - I will be "under" and it is only a 20 minute procedure and then this whole ordeal will FINALLY be over. I just wish dentists weren't one of my BIGGEST fears, but good oral hygiene is a must, so alas, let it be.

I enjoyed having Melanie around for her college winter break. We didn't really do anything that special beside spend time with each other (which is special enough) and get aggressive with the gym. Melanie has been so amazing during this whole "mouth" ordeal. She was a very supportive, loving partner. I love her so much. She gave me so much strength (as did my mother and Elizabeth). I don't know what I would do without them.

I have also been going to therapy once a week and love my therapist. I am finally with the right one. She is a wonderful, kind, understanding woman with a heart of gold and just talking to her and receiving advice helps so much. This is a big step for me and it feels great.

I have reconnected with old friends which has ignited a spark back in my soul that was so needed. It feels great to socialize more.

My trip to Iceland didn't work out but my mother and I are taking a trip to Key West Feb 2-6. I can't wait for that! SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO needed. This travel agent has been "travel deprived" for way too long. I am looking forward to that warm Florida sunshine and turquoise water.

Work is well. The pets are good. Yeah...for as crazy as things are...life is good.

Hopefully I will be better with blogging once my tooth issue is finally done and my life falls back to its usual routine.

I hope everyone is doing well! :)

Melanie - January 09

Moi - January 09

Peace,

Des

Fun with photos

Value your relationships

Today I was going through some old pictures and it dawned on me that yes, it's true! If someone is a real friend they will always be your friend. You can go years without seeing each other and then reconnect and it feels like you were never apart.

Recently I have reconnected with some long lost friends and it felt just like that. The same respect, humor and ease were all there. The compassion, understanding and encouragement. Whether it be through email or face-to-face, it felt/feels like "old times". What an amazing GIFT.

I feel so blessed to have these people in my life. As a 32 year old woman I know how valuable TRUE friendship is. How valuable relationships are. I am so blessed to have several friends I consider family. I am so blessed to be with the love of my life. I am so blessed to have loving "mamas". A brother who cares for me. Family that I know would always be there. I love my pets. I love my job. I love to travel. I love my guitar. I love music (the list can go on and on).

Sure it is in my nature to always strive for something more, as I am sure it is with most people. I want to see and do it all, but that real, true sense of happiness is being happy in the moment. Where you are...at...this...moment. There are a lot of things I am working on and I have a long way to go before I feel complete, but one thing I know is that I am a lucky person to have so much love and kindness in my life.

For all of you who have been there for me (and continue to be), who have made me laugh, held my hand through the tears, never turned your back and believed in me even when I didn't, THANK YOU. I love each and every one of you and thank God you are in my life. There is nothing I wouldn't do for any of you.

ALSO....

On the flip side of all this, it can sting when you realize someone isn't the person you thought they were. Someone you may have considered a friend really isn't. Doesn't act like one in the least. This too is part of life and a learning lesson. You need to get rid of toxic people who aren't good for you and don't have your best interest at heart. No, that is not some Hallmark card, that is truly my advice, as corny as it may sound. We all know and have these "friends" that pop up out of the blue and then vanish again. Why? What is the point? Maybe they are fishing to see if there is some "drama" going on in your life and when they find out there isn't -- they lose interest? Who knows. It's sad. It's shocking. It's life. You live, learn and move on.

As Jimmy Buffett says, "Breath in, breathe out, move on."

These are pretty much rambles from my mind this evening...lol. Something a little more deep than jackalopes and squirrels! ;)

The point? Hmm..the point is to say THANK YOU to all those "real" people who are in my life and genuinely care about me. I feel the same for you! And also to offer advice to cut out the people who aren't "real". You know who they are. What purpose do they serve?? Wish them well and bid farewell.

Be sure to hold dear and value the people who have your best interest at heart.

Love,

Des

High Tolerance

Before I head off to bed tonight I have to just say I am absolutely amazed. Friggin, *#^!*^#&!^# amazed at my tolerence for medicine (hopefully I won't curse myself). Right before Christmas I started having trouble with my wisdom teeth, or so I thought. I went to the dentist and they discovered that I had a gum infection and that it was "probably due to my wisdom teeth coming in." I had to wait until January for my dental insurance to kick in before going to an oral surgan so I could take a panorama xray.

Since the middle of December until now I have been taking: 4 ibuprofen every 4 hours, penicillin every 6 hours and vicodin every 4-6 hours. Whatever infection I have, well, it must be bad because ALL that medicine did NOTHING to quell the pain. Today, after my visit to the oral surgeon, it was confirmed that I do indeed have a bad gum infection and that the problem is NOT because of my wisdom teeth. He put me on Amoxicillin and Percocet. Finally something seems to be working, BUT, even with the percocet and the fact that my gums slightly feel better, I can STILL feel the pain in the background. I have NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER experienced such pain in my life (and trust me, I have been through a lot).

Anyway, the point of this "note" is that I am completely freaked out by how much medicine I took between yesterday and today. I have always been one to take Tylenol for headaches, antibiotics for infections and over the counter stuff for "whatever". I am a firm believer that if you can take something to fix something - go for it, but yesterday was just plain SCARY. I must've taken 30+ ibuprofen's in 24 hours and 6+ vicodens. ALL THAT and NOTHING quelled the pain. I don't know how I made it to this point. Every time I would take more ibuprofen I thought I was going to kick the bucket so to say. I was scared but the pain was THAT unbearable - it was worth the risk. Scary, huh??????

With all that medicine in my system I found what worked best was breathing deep, staying focused on breathing, talking down the pain to myself, standing up and walking and every once and awhile screaming like a roomful of infants. I keep telling myself that THIS WOULD PASS. I would get through this.

Support also helped. Melanie was the best partner. She stayed by my side, pretty much, during this whole ordeal. She checked on my constantly. She ran our errands. She cooked. Took care of the "kids" (our pets) and most importantly, just sat and hugged me. She rubbed my back, kissed my forehead and wrapped her arms around me. She assured me it would be okay. I believed her. That is always the best medicine. I was also lucky to have the support of my family and friends.

To make matters worse when I went to the oral surgeon today -- I FELL. Yup. I slipped and fell down the steps. Ouch. I had that mix of "pain, tears, laughter, swearing, pain, laughter and shame" mixed into one. As I walked down the hall, rubbing my ass and feeling crazed, tears (mixed with laughter) filled my face. I took a deep breath and regained control. Hey, at least the pain medicine I had in me worked for SOMETHING...lol! ;) That was the cherry on top and yet -- I made it through. I am writing this now. I survived.

Yes. I learned I have a very high tolerance for pain. For medicine. I feel I grew as a person through all this pain and agony. I learned a lot. We all find strength inside when we need it. Even when you think "this is it" and you "can't take no more"--- you do. You push through. I pushed through. I made it. I am not even 5% better than yesterday, but learning as much as I did and feeling the love around me --- I feel better than ever.

-Des